Hello ♡,
The rush to certainty is exhausting.
We live as if we should know everything all the time, and quickly. We think of “I don’t know” often as a failure of clarity, of nerve, or as simply something we shouldn’t feel. There is a pressure to know what you think and how you feel, and on demand. There is a pressure to know things that that just may not be knowable. (And yes, there are absolutely times when we have to know something on a schedule, and that is an entirely different and important conversation.)
Maybe God, and mystery, and how we feel about that thing, are bigger than our pressure to know.
And perhaps life is much more complicated than our certainty about rules and each other.
And we are definitely much more beautifully complex than our reduced versions of ourselves and one another.
Knowing anything is a process. And not knowing something is an invitation. “I don’t know” is not a failure, it is an important place to visit, that instead we often rush through.
I like to think of “I don’t know” as a whole neighborhood, an inviting one with a local library, park benches, and cafes. It can be a beautiful place to spend time in, and allow yourself to rest in not knowing something yet. It’s a place where curiosity and compassion hang out together as you get a reprieve from the false urgency to be certain all the time. It’s a place that is an important stop in the process of knowing anything - and one we often barrel or rush through. It’s a place that deserves our attention and time, and sometimes staying in that place helps us to know what we need to know next.
What would it feel like to hang out in that neighborhood, allowing yourself not to know something you don’t know? Allowing it to be ok?
When we allow ourselves to stay in a place of “I don’t know,” or “I don’t know yet,” we can experience the freedom of curiosity.
Curiosity without an agenda feels a lot more like love, and a lot more like an invitation.
Curiosity without judgement also feels a lot more like love. Curiosity without comparison feels a lot more like love. And this allows you to be where you are without the pressure to be anywhere else yet.
It’s ok to stay in curiosity.
Curiosity often helps you know where to go next.
Curiosity can sound like: Tell me more. Or, what is this feeling coming up for me? Or simply: attentive silence.
And when we make space for that curiosity we will learn more, in time, about what we think, what we feel, what we know, and what we don’t know yet.
With you,
Monica
Notes!
The Still Becoming Podcast is taking a break for the rest of the summer, even the re-releases. I am so excited about amazing guests we will have this fall, stay tuned!
And! I will be traveling the next few weeks, and while the work on the book will and must continue, I am not sure what else will. That is something I don’t know yet, get it? See current newsletter above lol. So if there is a break in the newsletter just know I will be back with fresh ideas and maybe some beautiful pics!
Gratefully,
Monica
Very inspiring. Not knowing is not the same as not caring. Curiosity is a positive strong force ...